TVLAND Families
Part 2 Conflict
May 4, 20008
Pastor Brad Dyrness
Sparks Nazarene Church
When someone says… It really means...
What Married Couples Fight About
Kids In-laws Sex # 1 By far – Money
“Conflict is the price we pay for greater intimacy.” Les and Leslie Parrott in their book: Saving Your Marriage Before it Starts
One of the keys to a successful relationship is knowing how to handle conflict.
Avoiding conflict… will hurt your marriage.
Fighting itself isn't the problem. The problem is how they argue.
2My goal is that they will be encouraged and knit together by strong ties of love. I want them to have full confidence because they have complete understanding of God’s secret plan, which is Christ himself. 3In him lie hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge. Colossians. 2:2-3 The Message
What are the treasures of Wisdom and Knowledge he is speaking about?
The keys to connecting with God’s peace for your home …
What do we fight over?
Paul gives us some possibilities Vs 5-6 – though not exhaustive.
1. Earthly things and Personal Agenda
Parrott says: “Ninety percent of the issues we bicker over can probably be overlooked” Why? It has no eternal value and it is mostly about us.
Conflict is painful, people do get hurt and relationships are at risk, but conflict worked through creates greater intimacy!
Paul says the wrath of God is waiting for those who allow these issues to dominate their relationships… Actions have consequences.
When you allow sex, impure motives, lust, selfish desires and the idea that you have to have it all rule – you will pay a relationship price!
2. The way we deal with conflict… Vss 8-9
What kinds of things happen when the intensity is high?
When we are controlled by impure, selfish and prideful, I have to have what I want motives we fight ugly!
Paul says that those tactics are not in the image of our creator.
Father, Son, Holy Spirit – a model of relationship!
Remember conflict is not wrong – how we engage in it can be.
3. Vs 15 – Let the peace of God rule in your Hearts…
… dealing with the conflict we do have in the manner empowered by the one living in us!
Remember that Jesus sat down at the right hand of the Father. Vs 1 ~ Jesus completed the work.
The battle is finished, the victory is secure.
Hidden with Christ…
Offer Grace
Give up your right to be right
Place the needs of others before you
Set:
Giving above getting,
Serving above ruling,
Forgiving above avenging
And whatever you do,
whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving
thanks to God the Father through him.